my friend jennifer and i decided that we weren't going to go to the high school that all of our junior high classmates were going to. (we heard the people up there were mean...and hey, we were tiny little 14 year olds..) so off we went to allen central high school, home of the rebel. not to mention the backwoods hilljack sister screwin' pothead asshole. so i left all of my friends except her... and embarked on a journey that would forever change me. (okay... that was a little *too* much drama.)

when i got to high school, i was a completely changed person. the way i viewed myself, my friends, and the world around me was changed forever. i began to notice how unbelievably immature high school rodents are. especially jennifer. boy, was she stupid. so i started hanging around melissa, who would be my best friend for a couple of years. until the tragedy that i won't go into. (if you're readin' this, miss, i love you still... think of me sometimes, i think of you.) melissa and i got into trouble a lot. i don't understand how we did, but we did. the first time i went to a bar, it was with her. and oh, what a bar it is. (what's three miles long, red, and has two teeth? the line at marlowe's. ha. ha. ha.) i even went to jail with this girl. but anyway..

somehow i managed to trap myself a boyfriend. chris. i loved chris. i think i always will. we dated for a long time..my first real love, i guess. our relationship was pure hell, though, as much love as i felt for him, i can't deny that. i guess i wasn't cut out to play the football player's trophy girl role. so after two years of mental SHIT, we broke up. for the last time. i switched schools, i got all my old friends back, and i became the person i am today. a no nonsense, i won't take your bullshit, who the fuck are you, go the hell away, lovely kinda girl.

after i switched schools, i started hanging around with a whole new group of wonderful people. amy jo, wendell, melissa, amanda, jackie, jimmy, ryan, angel.. the list goes on and on. melissa and i (i seem to have a thing for melissas, eh?) were best friends. very very very best friends. we were always together. inseparable. if i remember correctly, and i usually don't, amy and melissa were friends before amy and i were. i think that's how i got to know amy. once i did, i knew my life was changed.. amy's now like a sister to me. hell, she helped me achieve my goal of becoming an alcoholic and dropping out of high school three or four months before graduation. no, seriously, i don't blame her for that. i just wonder how the hell she managed to get up and go to school after we'd drank ourselves into a stupor the night before. and this is an odd place to completely change the subject, but i'm an odd person. deal. my closest guy friend from 'back home' is wendell. he's still my very closest r/t friend. i love him. i completely adore him. i don't know why he thinks so highly of me, but hey, who am i to argue with him. he's the greatest guy i know. he's cute, smart, funny, warped like me. oh, and i'm marrying him, too, when i'm thirty. i think. he should be rich enough by then. anywho.

i know i'm leaving a lot of stuff out here, i'm trying to cover the most important things that happened to me in high school. i hate to say this, but most of the shit that happened in high school, i don't really care to remember. i value the friendships that i made, even though they're all nearly gone now, besides amy and jackie. i guess the biggest thing that i left out was that i moved out of my mom's house. see, my mom and dad divorced when i was a baby. (i know, i'm *still* a baby..get over it.) mom remarried when i was about 13 years old, and we'd moved five times by the time i was 16. we used to fight a lot. so i moved. made it a little easier on myself, i guess, never really thought how much of mom's heart that ripped away. i moved in with my grandmother, a nice, senile old lady who, although i've been known to say less than kind things about her, saved me. she gave me a bed, a roof, and a phone. and hot pockets, doritos, and kool-aid. she even let me keep my computer on 27 hours a day. what a woman. when i finally decided i couldn't live there anymore..(or i decided that i was sick of not going to school, and drinking all the damn time) ... at the ripe old age of almost-18, i made the move back to my mother's. she, my stepfather, and my brother ryan had moved two hours away to the big city. not my kind of place, but what can you do. and here i've been ever since.

now, to say i'm happier here than i was a year ago back home would be the biggest lie i can possibly think of. i hate it here. i hate lexington, i hate traffic, i hate having no friends, i hate being in this house all day, i hate not seeing my father, i hate not seeing all the stupid people i hate. i hate it. i live for the rare weekend that i get to spend back home with amy and my father. did i mention i hate this place?